Well I already broke one goal and that was writing every night!!!  Things are going fairly OK!  I haven't been 100% perfect; however, I can tell you I've done 100% better than I have in the past few months!  Normally I will sit at my desk and eat nothing but junk food and I am proud to admit that I have not done that at all this past week.  Tonight I had 1 piece of pizza and a bread stick and that is probably the worst thing I have had to eat all week.....I take that back...I did have 4 oreos the other night!  Unfortunately they were in my house so of course I had to eat them!!  I asked Kyle who a good trainer would be in Watertown so he referred me to someone and at first I was VERY leery because she is a female.  Now...before you go jumping to conclusions...I don't do well with female trainers because I tend to manipulate them.  When it starts getting a little tough I tell them I can't do anymore and they have me move to the next thing!!  Every male trainer I've had has said suck it up and keep going!  Also, I like the guy mentality in a gym such as sweat dripping, burping, swearing, being cocky etc.!  Anyway, I knew Kyle was aware of all of this so I called this person and I think she will be AWESOME!!  Not quite as great as Kyle but a close 2nd!  We are going to get together in the next couple of weeks and discuss a plan of action and then go from there!! 

Some have been asking me what I'm eating or what time of diet I'm doing and have asked if they can join.  I welcome any and all to partake.  The bonus is it's free!!  Meaning you don't have any membership fees, no packaged food fees etc.!!  The one thing I am working really hard on is telling myself it is not a diet because it ultimately is a lifestyle change.  Every diet I have been on in the past tend to fail because once it is over I go back to old eating habits which obviously results in weight gain and then some and then you try another diet because of course that last one didn't work since you gained all of your weight back and....well you see where this is going!!  So here is what I do:

First thing I do when my feet hit the floor in the morning is use the bathroom and then go eat breakfast.  I usually have 3 egg whites and a piece of fruit. Now I know some of you are saying...oh that won't work for you because you're never hungry in the morning.  Well I'm here to tell you that this is how I was too but once you do this you will be more than ready to eat once you wake up!!  Then 2-3 hours after that I eat oatmeal with protein powder and milk with a piece of fruit.  Then 2-3 hours after that I eat tuna, lettuce, spinach, 1 tsp. olive oil, and some pita chips...then 2-3 hours after that a protein bar and popcorn...then 2-3 hours after that more protein and a veggie and just continue until bed.  I always eat some form of protein before bed.  Usually cottage cheese or turkey.  It is important that you don't go longer than 3 hours after eating.  Like I said it is very structured and a lot of planning but this last week I can already tell I have more energy and I haven't even exercised yet!!

OK..I've rambled on long enough tonight.  I have my meals ready for tomorrow and I'm heading to bed.  I hope y'all had a GREAT weekend!

Love and Peace...Jvonne

A New Start

Well....for those of you crazy people that enjoy by blog...here we go again!!!  As you can see it has been 2 years since I blogged and obviously a lot has changed within those 2 years!!  Long story short...I'm still over weight!!  I have a feeling that will be with me my whole life; however, it is how I deal with it that will get me through.  I have decided to do this blog a little differently and not focus so much on the number and how much weight I've lot but yet how I'm feeling throughout this adventure as well as the ups, downs, feelings, emotions, and reasons behind the eating.  In other words, looking at this food addiction and wonder why in the hell it has consumed me!!!  Now, let me begin by throwing out some disclaimers!!  Remember...this is my blog, my feelings, and my thoughts!  I love any verbal feedback; however, PLEASE do not EVER tell me I shouldn't feel that way or you're beautiful just the way you are, or you're not addicted to food, or just try to eat a little bit of chocolate to fulfill your cravings!!!!  For those of you that don't know me, I'm an all or nothing type of person...hence...addiction!!  I envy those of you that can eat a miniature candy bar and feel content....NOT ME!!!!  I compare it to giving a half of a beer to an alcoholic and telling them that should satisfy your craving!!!  Oh it satisfied it all right as well as opened up a BEAST inside of me to just seek out more junk food.  Trust me, if it is not in my reach...I will make it in my reach!  Another thing is this is my blog; therefore, my spelling and grammatical mistakes!!!  One last thing is...the way I eat is the way I eat.  PLEASE don't criticize the food I consume or tell me I'm eating too much protein or certain things are gross.  If you don't like it, please don't do it then!!!  If you feel that this blog would help anyone you know within your life please feel free to pass it along.  It is still my dream and goal to help over weight people succeed in the future!!!  OK...with all of this being said here is the plan of my blog.  I will not be sharing my weight with you for a couple of reasons...one to be quite honest I don't know what it is!  I have a ball park figure but I'm very ashamed and embarrassed to step on a scale right now.  Also, as I mentioned earlier I don't want to focus on the number.  I think in the past I would get frustrated if I gained, barely lost anything, or didn't lose what I thought I should.  So...at some point I will share how much I've lost but it will not be the focus.  My main focus is to look at and discuss why I am overweight.  The obvious answer is because I take in too many calories and don't get rid of any of them through exercise!!  However, it goes beyond that!!  There are emotions, thoughts, and feelings that usually go behind my eating.  Some call it emotional eating...I call it addiction!  So...if you're still reading this...I commend you!!  Let's buckle our seat belts, put on our stretchy pants and enjoy the ride!!!

I will be writing nightly...some longer than others...but the goal is a nightly blog!  Tomorrow I will start dissecting what does this food addiction mean and look like as it applies to my life!  Again...any feedback is appreciated and know that I appreciate each and every one of you for being my cheer leader!!!

Love and Peace...Jvonne

Test

OK...I'm testing this out to see if those that want to follow my blog can get to it.  Please leave me a mesasge on my facebook post!!  If I get some responses I will continue :)

June 1, 2010

Holy cow....happy June everyone! Where in the world has the time gone. I hate to say this but before we know it we will be asking our loved ones what they would like for Christmas! Anyway, this weigh in was a gain. I gained .4 lbs and I'm not the least bit upset over it. I actually was quite pleased because I thought it would have been a bigger gain. We went camping with my family this weekend and camping isn't always so healthy!! I LOVE to eat and that is my problem! I wonder when and if the food obsession will ever leave. I'm sure it will become less but holy cow it gets ridiculous from time to time! I look forward to my future in that I will be able to help out others who are going through the same struggles. I am facebook friends with some of the former biggest loser contestants and it is fun to see how they struggle with the same things. I know they are not any different than I am but it's always nice to hear similar stories!

I am also very excited because I have my husband on board with me now. He continues to lose weight and continues to do well. We just got in from a walk and it's funny because in the past we both would have not gone because it was "chilly". When I mentioned going on a walk he was excited and eager to go versus trying to get out of it like we both normally would have done!

I have finally come to the conclusion that this is not a race and it will all happen within good time and I am OK with this. I look forward to the continued journey! I am going to scrap book my journey (don't laugh because I really am not creative!) so I am looking forward to seeing the changes!

I hope all of you are doing well. I challenge you to find a journey within your life and scrap book it as well to see your progress!

Love and peace to all....Jvonne

May 25, 2010

Greetings to all!! Tonight is a bitter sweet night in that the finale was AWESOME for Biggest Loser but depressed because it is the finale!!! I am really not a T.V. watcher at all but I LOVE that show and never miss an episode! Anyway, talk about inspiration. They ALL looked wonderful and it is awesome to see how people can lose weight without any form of surgery. I think we jump to quick fixes way to often and we just need to be patient, work hard, cry, and rejoice in our victories! Trust me, I have work to do on some of those....such as patience!! It is getting better but I am constantly reminding myself of it takes time!!

My week was fairly decent. I lost 1.8 lbs for a total loss of 36 lbs. I am so proud of myself for continuing on because by now, in the past, I would have quit because it wasn't going fast enough. I know silly but true. I have finally accepted, I have always realized, that I want to be around for my son and I need to take care of me and my health. He deserves a FUN active mom not a mom who sits down because she doesn't have the energy.

My biggest struggle this week was food! Ahhhhh.....imagine that! Really....I was OBSESSED with food for the majority of the week. There were times when I thought I was losing it because all I could think about was ice cream, chocolate, anything that wasn't healthy. But....for the most part....I managed to do OK. I did indulge but did not go wild!

Overall, I feel good about my progress and how things are going. I am so happy to have been re inspired by people on the biggest loser. My challenge to you is to evaluate your life and look at ways you can reach out and inspire someone within their life. It doesn't have to be weight loss by the way!!

Take care and I'll be posting every Tuesday!

Love and Peace to all....Jvonne

May 20, 2010

OK...I know I have been horrible with this blog thing and I have to be honest....I really didn't think people read it!! I have had quite a few people tell me that they miss my blog so I thought I would try to get back on track with it. Ironically, I received a message from some random person on face book asking me to join her page regarding her weight loss journey so I did because I am always looking for other people to inspire me. Anyway, she was saying how she was hoping to be on the biggest loser and didn't make it so she sat back and reflected what she really wanted out of it. It is cool because she is doing everything that she could do on the biggest loser and that is hiring a personal trainer, sharing her progress for the world to see, posting pictures for the world to see, and meeting with a nutritionist and counselor. I thought...what a GREAT idea!!! So, I am going to keep up with sharing the journey with all of you. I will also post (hopefully this weekend) pictures! A good friend of mine keeps asking me if I have taken pictures and I always say no!! I know I need to take them because down the road I will look back and be shocked! There is already a picture from my brother's wedding that kills me every time I see it and I will NEVER be back at that weight of 317 lbs. Anyway, I do meet with a personal trainer once a week and go to weight watchers for my nutritional part. So....who needs to be on the biggest loser anyway!!!!

So the journey has been up and down since my last post. I have now lost a total of 34.2 lbs and weight 277.8 I believe. If you were to ask me today how I feel things are going I would tell you absolutely horrible and I am a health failure!! Today has been the crappiest eating day I have probably had since I started weight watchers 5 months ago. I have ate everything and anything and really had no desire to quit. I feel miserable which is probably a good thing and it is a nice reminder as to why I don't want to do that again! It's kind of like a person with a hangover who asks themselves why in the hell they went out and drank so much! Anyway, I know tomorrow is a new day and I look forward to a fresh start. I really do feel good about the progress I am making. I would be lying if I were to say I was happy with the pace because of course I would like to lose 5 lbs every week! I know that is not realistic and in order for it to stay off for good I need small losses but I become VERY impatient! My mother has also gotten back into weight watchers so it has been fun comparing things with her as well as our success!

I am still planning on doing the half marathon in January in Phoenix. I know it will be a HUGE challenge but my gosh if the biggest loser people can do marathons and one of them is still over 300 lbs there is NO reason I can't do a half! A friend of mine has already registered so I can't back out now because it was my idea!!

Alright...I am done rambling. I look forward to a new fresh day and I also look forward to continuing to share my journey with all of you! Please take special care of yourselves because we never know when things in our lives may change!

Love and Peace to all....Jvonne

March 25, 2010

HOLY COW I haven't written a blog for a LONG time! Well things continue to be going well. I am on week 12 of weight watchers and so far I have lost 24 lbs. so I am averaging 2lbs a week which is VERY nice! I can honestly say that I feel good about this whole process which is a first. Now don't get me wrong...I certainly have my struggles. I don't know why but these past couple of weeks all I want to do is EAT! It is so weird! What is even more unusual about it, for myself anyway, is I don't care what I eat meaning I would sit down and eat a ton of watermelon, lettuce, oranges, and of course chocolate!!! NO I am not pregnant!!!! Anyway, I have been managing to get through it but it is not fun!

I think my biggest obstacle has been the workouts at this point. I have been struggling with the gym only for the mere fact of time. I am so tired so I just need to push myself to get there!

I have had a lot of people tell me how they wish they had my motivation and all I have to say is you can have it...you need to reach deep inside of yourself and find what motivates you. Mine was the fact that I had to watch my husband grieve, and continue to grieve, his mother's death due to cancer. We believe it started in the lungs as she was a HEAVY smoker and I REFUSE to have my son watch me die because I didn't take care of my health and remained overweight and unhealthy. So...find what your drive is and run with it!!!

Well...I am closing here. I will try to be more active with my blog!

Love and Peace to all....Jvonne